COMPLETE INSANITY!
by SumikotheGREAT
Summary: What happens when Valentines Day comes to the Avatar universe? Break dancing, Zuko playing with barbies, and really bad poetry! And I know it's out of season, but I was bored. EVEN BETTER VERSION!
1. Chapter 1

I decided to star meh story over cuz I messed up so much. Like the disclaimer!

Disclaimer: I don't own it, see? -holds up list of things I own- 1) dead fly 2) SASUKE! (Well, acually, I owned him in a video game as Naruto, but that's beside the point) 3) An army of angery teddybears

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COMPLETE INSANITY!

Zuko: See, Doctor, there's this girl named Katara, and she is hott. Lately, all I can think about is her. I feel like I want to be with her for the rest of my life…

Psychiatrist: And how does that make you FEEL---?

Zuko: Like I want to be with her for the rest of my life

Psychiatrist: And how does that make you FEEL---?

Zuko: Are you even listening to me?

Psychiatrist: And how does that make you FEEL---?

Zuko: Why me?

Psychiatrist: And how does that make you FEEL---?

Zuko: Sigh...

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**MEANWHILE**

Aang: Katara, guess what day is is in the third dimension

Katara: What?

Aang: VALENTINES DAY! _-Aang gets out a box of chocolates and makes a kissy face.-_

Katara: What are you doing? -_Katara makes a cross with her fingers as if to ward off a vampire_.- STALKER! GET AWAY FROM ME! -_Runs away-_.

Meng: _-Taps Aang on the shoulder from behind-_ Oh, A-ang. _-Gets out chocolate box and makes kissy face-_

Aang: -_turns around and drops chocolates. He crosses his fingers in the same fashion as Katara_- STALKER! -_runs away-

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**Elsewhere**

_Sokka is walking along, when he bumps into some random girl from the street._

Sokka: HEY! Watch where you're going!

Girl: Why don't you watch it!

Sokka: You want a piece of me? Bring it!

Girl: Oh, I'll bring it like a FedEx truck!

Sokka: -_Hugs girl and girl starts kissing him-_ I love you!

Girl: I love you more!

Cupid: My work here is done.

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See, isn't this better? Mwa ha ha! RANDOMNESS!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: The day I own it will be the day I rule you all and force you to make a portal to the Avatar-verse so Sokka can meet his soul mate: ME! Yes, and the girl's kinda a Mary Sue.

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**Chapter 2**

_Zuko is on the computer, when he sees a banner ad that says "find true love" and clicks on it._

Zuko: Let's see… I'm a 16-year-old male looking for a 16-year-old female. _-he fills out the rest of the requirements and passes the background test-_

Computer: You have one reply_ -Zuko reads the reply. It says, "Hi, I'm Lola! I'm a supermodel who likes hott guys with lots of cash! Would you like to meet me at the fanciest restaurant in town tonight at eight?"-_

Zuko: -_typing_- Hi, Lola. I would love to dine with you tonight. Eight 'o clock sharp then. -_Uncle Iroh happens to be passing by the door- -speaking_- Quick my Uncle! Tell the crew… I HAVE FOUND A DATE! MWA HA HA HA HA!

Iroh: You should take her to a cozy little teashop; every one likes tea.

Zuko: Uncle, you are so predictable.

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**MEANWHILE**

Aang: Katara, I have a poem for you.

Katara: Oh, how romantic! READ IT TO ME!_ -eye twitch-_

Aang: Katara, your eyes are like two deep pools of blue, but your feet… _-Aang squints at the paper-_ smell like… stinky poo?

Katara: Eh…

Aang: Your voice is like a thousand birds singing… uh… at least if someone, their necks were ringing

Katara: uh…….. O.o

Aang: Your beauty is astounding… actually, you probably couldn't beat a monkey at a beauty pageant

Katara: THAT DIDN'T EVEN RHYME! _-She slaps Aang and stomps off-_

Aang: Sokka! That's the last time I ask you for romance advice!

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**Elsewhere**

Sokka: You are the weirdest girl I've ever met.

Girl: How should I spell your name? Oh! I've got it! S.O.K.K.A! (Theperiods are supposed to be hearts.)

Sokka: What are you writing?

Girl: My confessions of love for you.

Sokka: That's sweet! No. Seriously. What are you writing?

Girl: -_trying to change_ _the subject_- Do you want to eat somewhere tonight?

Sokka: Let's go to that teashop around the corner!

Girl: Okay, good bye, Sokka _-leaves to go get ready-_


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I own it. MWA HA HA HA! -gets carried away by evil gnomes that carry away liars-

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**Chapter 3 ZUKO'S DATE!**

_The girl is waiting for Sokka, when Zuko arrives, looking for Lola the supermodel. Seeing as the girl was beautiful, she could have easily been mistaken for a supermodel, and so… she was._

Zuko: Are you Lola? _-he grabs both of her wrists in an intimate (like he knows her)gesture-_

Girl: Uh… _-before she has time to answer, Sokka comes to the rescue-_

Sokka: Get your hands off my girlfriend!

Zuko: Your girlfriend? Ha! She's my date!

_The poor girl has no clue what's going on and Sokka and Zuko are about to get into a fight over her, when a girl about Aang's age tapped Zuko's shoulder._

Girl about Aang's age: Hi, are you Zuko?

Zuko: Yes

Girl about Aang's age: Hi, I'm Lola

Zuko: Sixteen year old super model?

Lola: Heh,_ -shrugs-_ I lied. Who doesn't?

Zuko: This is embarrassing…_ -walks off-_

Lola: Wow, He lasted point five seconds longer than the last one! I'm getting good at this!

_Girl faints and Sokka catches her_


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: -is bound and gagged by gnomes- mmmph phu mmm mpherm mumph Head gnome: She says "If I owned Avatar, I wouldn't be bound and gagged by evil gnomes"

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**Chapter 4… ZUTARA PARADICE!**

_Aang is sitting on a bench in the park, when Lola plops down next to him sulking._

Aang: You just get dumped, too?

Lola: Yep…

Aang: Hey you're pretty cute!

Lola: Thanks! I'm a supermodel who likes hot guys with lots of money!

Aang: Well, I may not have a lot of money, but I sure am hot!

Lola: _-GIGGLE-_ XD

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**MEANWHILE**

Katara: I can't believe him! Can't win against a monkey! Ha!

Zuko: What are you rambling on about, now?

Katara: PIE! Plus I just dumped Aang

Zuko: Really, I just dumped…. Never mind.

Katara: Do I want to know?

Zuko: no.

Katara: You wanna go eat somewhere? Not that I like you or anything… heh heh, just a pity date.

Zuko: Yeah… not that I like you or anything, heh heh. -_Blush-_

Katara: lets eat some where with ice-cold milk shakes

Zuko: No spicy!

Katara: ICEY!

Zuko: SPICY!

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Elsewhere

Sokka and girl are kissing, when girl looks up and notices the camera guy

Girl: Do you mind? _-pulls screen down and gets back to business- _(Reader: that doesn't sound right...)

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almost caught up...


	5. Chapter 5

Yes, I abuse Zuko. Okay, and barbies.

Diclaimer: I don't own it; get over it.

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**Chapter 5… ZUKO STILL PLAYS WITH BARBIES!**

_Uncle Iroh is walking past Zuko's room when he hears Zuko making funny voices. He walks quietly into the room and sees Zuko holding a Barbie doll and a Ken doll_

Zuko: -_deep voice_- I love you, Barbie _-high voice-_ I don't love you, Ken. I love that hunky hottie, Zuko! -_Normal voice_- I love you too, Barbie!

Iroh: Zuko, maybe you SHOULD go back to that psychiatrist…

Zuko: NEVER!

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**MEANWHILE**

Aang: Lola and I are going out now, Katara

Katara: that's nice…

Aang: What? Couldn't YOU find a BOYFRIEND?

Katara: Uh, EXCUSE ME? My new boyfriend is way hotter than you, and much more romantic!

Aang: Really, I'd like to meet him, then

Katara: You already know him!

Aang: You're going out with Sokka?

Katara: EW! NO! _-turns green and runs off-

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**Elsewhere**

_Sokka and the girl are walking in the park, holding hands, when the girl once again notices the cameraman_

Girl: What are you, stalking us! Come on Sokky-Poo!

Sokka: _-girl drags him away by the back of his shirt collar and he drops his ice cream cone-_ NO! My ice cream!

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Poor Sokka lost his ice cream -cries for him- 


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Me is to own as billboard is to tenbillion pogosticks

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**Chapter…. 6!**

Zuko: Uncle, I know what I want to do for the rest of my pitifully weird life!

Uncle Iroh: What, Prince Zuko?

Zuko: I want to… TAP DANCE! _-The lights turn off and then a spotlight comes onto Zuko, who is suddenly in a tuxedo with tap shoes, a top hat, and a cane thingy.-_ Hit it! _-A song starts playing and he starts tap dancing. Half way into the song, another spotlight turns on with katara under it. She starts dancing too-

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**MEANWHILE**

_Aang and Lola are giggling and laughing when a boy walks up to Aang_

Boy: Hey, you! Get away from my girl!

Lola: Go away, Billy Bob Joe Bob George Edison Harrison Einstein the third-and-one-half! I dumped you, and I'm not coming back to you!

Aang: She wants you to leave Billy Bob Joe Bob Something Something Blah Blah Blah!

Boy: I challenge you to a dance off! Lola, I'll win you back one way or another!

Aang: I accept your challenge, Person Whose Name Escapes My Memory!

Lola: No Aang! He's won the annual playground break dancing contest since the fourth grade!

Aang: Well, I've been break dancing for one hundred six years! (TBC in next chappie!)

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**Elsewhere**

_Sokka and the girl are walking down the beach hand in hand, when the girl notices a starfish that was washed up on shore._

Girl: Sokka, will you hold my purse for a second?

Sokka: Okay _-the girl hands him the purse. Sokka appears to have trouble holding it because it is so heavy-_

Girl: -_The girl picks up the star fish, and sets it closer to the ocean, where a wave picks it up and carries it out to sea_- Thank you, Shnookums_ -She takes back her purse and kisses him on the cheek.- -Sokka blushes-_

Sokka: What do you have in that thing? Bricks?

Girl: Oh, something like that… She has a sly smile on her face Ha! There you are! She spots the camera guy I'm ready for you this time! -_She gets out a sledgehammer from purse, and the camera guy runs away_- GET BACK HERE, STALKER GUY!_ -runs after him-_

Sokka: HEY! Uh… YOU! COME BACK!


	7. Chapter 7

I got reviews! -dies of happyness- -comesback to life-

Disclaimer: I don't own Avatar. YOU CAN'T SUE ME! I'M JUST FOUR YEARS OF HIGHSCHOOL AND A GOOD LAW SCHOOL/ COLLEGE AWAY FROM BECOMING AN AUSTRAILIAN LAWYER!

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**Chapter 7**

_Zuko and Katara are still tap dancing, when Zuko stops. The spotlight goes out, and then the light turns on and they are back in their normal clothes. The music stops, then Katara stops dancing, noticing Zuko has stopped._

Zuko: Wow, that was a fast phase.

Katara: Yeah, we didn't even finish one song!

Zuko: Let's go watch Barney!

Katara: YEAH!

Zuko & Katara: I love you! You love me! _-they leave the room-_

Uncle Iroh: -_Looks around the room to make sure no one is looking, then he starts tap dancing-_

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**MEANWHILE**

Boy: Let the games begin!

Aang: BRING IT!

Boy: It's all ready brought…. Brung… bringed…. WHATEVER!

Aang: It's it's already been brought!

Boy: GRRRRR! _-does a series of break dancing moves-_

Aang: Pshhh! Is that all you got? _-does even BETTER break dancing moves, including, everyone's favorite, the worm.-_

Boy: Ha! I can do better than that! -_does best moves YET-_

Aang: Sure… _-does air bending move to blow boy away-_

Lola: Oh, Aang! -_Lola hugs Aang, and he blushes-

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**Elsewhere**

_Sokka is walking down a street ALONE, when he sees Zuko_

Zuko: What happened to your girlfriend?

Sokka: She ran off with some other guy

Zuko: Can't say I didn't see it coming…

Sokka: _-Death glare-_

_The girl comes running up_

Girl: Grrrr! He got away!

Sokka: So you run off with some other guy and expect me to just take you back, huh?

Girl: Uhh… _- sees camera guy-_ There you are! Let's see you run away from this, stalker boy! _-gets out chainsaw from purse and chases the camera guy-_

Sokka: And I still don't know her name

Zuko: I think I've had enough weirdness for one night…. -_walks away-_

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Mwa ha ha! Chainsaws are fun!

Innervoice 2: Watch out... or I might come to your house itn the middle of the night... with a chainsaw and... TRIM YOUR HEDGES! MWA HA HA!


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: Avatar does not have pink polka dotted squirrels. If I owned it they would be everywhere. That proves I do not own Avatar.

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**Chapter 8**

Katara: Zuko, I want to change my name.

Zuko: To what?

Katara: Zuko

Zuko: NO!

Katara: ALL RIGHT THEN! I'LL GO GET THE PAPERS!

Zuko: -_still yelling_- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

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**MEANWHILE**

Lola: Aang, I'm gonna change my name.

Aang: To what?

Lola: ZUKO!

Aang: -_eye twitches-_

_They suddenly hear Zuko screaming "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"_

Lola: It's a sign! I should change my name to NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

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**Elsewhere**

_The girl runs up to Sokka and hugs him, but he turns away._

Sokka: What, did you get tired of that OTHER boy

Girl: What other boy? -_She sounds hurt-_

Sokka: You know, the one you keep running off with...

Girl: Sokka, you're the only boy in my life…

Sokka: What about the one with a camera?

Girl: He's not a boy he's a man. Men don't count. And besides, I'deat broccolibefore I ever asked him out or even thought about liking him.

Sokka: I just… just go…

Girl: Fine! I thought you were different! I can see now that was a mistake! -_the girl turns around to walk away, but sokka grabs her arm. When she turns around he sees she's crying-_

Sokka: I'll take you back on one condition… you tell me your name

Girl: _-thinking-_ works every time... -_speaking-_ Zuko

_Suddenly they here Prince Zuko's "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"_

Girl: If you don't like it, Sokka, you don't have to freak out. I'll change it!

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Personally, I think the girl is kinda evil in a good kind of way. Like me! Me likes reviews!


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: Does it LOOK like I own Avatar? -is wearing shirt saying "Look at me! I don't own Avatar!"-

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**Chapter 9**

Katara: Hey, Zuko! I decided I like my old name better

Zuko: -_STILL screaming-_ NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Katara: ZUKO! DID YOU HEAR ME?

ZUKO: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Katara: weirdo.

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**MEANWHILE**

Lola: I'm phat

Aang: no you're not!

Lola: -_offended_- Uh! Excuse me! slaps him and walks off

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**Elsewhere**

Girl: I have the papers!

Sokka: What papers? Are we buying a house? Are you going to ask me to marry you? Aren't we rushing things a bit? I've only known you for less than twenty-four hours!

Girl: _-rolls eyes-_ A) the guy usually does the asking B) The papers for changing my name.

Sokka: Oh… _-sounds disappointed-_

Girl:….. But maybe someday……. When we're older…… _-blush-_

Sokka: Yeah….- _blusher-_ About your name….

Girl: Oh, yeah! My name! I changed it to Sakura!

Sokka: I like that…..

_Suddenly they see Invader Zim_

Zim: Out of the way Earth scum!

Sakura: What are you doing here! You're not even on this show!

Zim: That shows what you know!

Sakura: Aliens…

Zim: Who told you I was an Alien!

Sakura: It's kind of obvious.

Zim: NO IT'S NOT! I HAVE A DISGUISE! DIGIUSE! -_points to a sign he's wearing that reads "I am **NOT** an alien"-_

Sokka: This day just gets weirder and weirder…_ -walks away-_

Sakura: Sokka, my love! Don't leave me! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! _-drops to knees-_ WHY?

Zim: Humans _-shudder-

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It's almost done! -cry- GOOD THING THERE'S A SEQUAL! (Trust me, the sequal is crazier than the original) 


	10. Chapter 10

It'd amost done! Done you wanna cry? -tear-

Disclaimer: Still don't own it

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**Chapter 10 THE BIG FINISH!**

_Meng is walking down the street when Billy Bob Joe Bob a-ma-hoozits lands in front of her._

Meng: OHEMGEE! Are you okay?

Billy Bob: Yeah, I am, now…

Meng: _-giggle blush-_

Billy Bob: Wanna run off together?

Meng: Okay _-giggle_- you have BIG ears…

_the happy couple skips off into the sunset happily

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**MEANWHILE**

Aang: Lola, I'm sorry! You're very fat! You are completely and totally over weight like Sokka should be!

Lola: ………….

Aang: TIME FOR PLAN B! Lola, I got you a diamond necklace!

_They start singing Oops I did it again by Brittany Spears_

Lola: Oh, it's beautiful, but wait a minute, isn't this...?

Aang: Yeah, yes it is.

Lola: But I thought the old lady dropped it into the ocean in the end…

Aang: Well, baby, I went down and got it for you.

Lola: Oops!...I did it again to your heart! Got lost in this game, oh baby! Oops!...You think that I'm sent from above! I'm not that innocent!

_They stop singing and Sokka comes running up_

Sokka: Hey Aang! Have you seen the necklace I was gonna give to Sakura? _-Sees Lola wearing Heart of the Ocean-_ Please tell me you didn't…

Aang: Uh… I didn't?

Sokka: Sleep with your eyes open...

Aang: Hey Lola, I'm gonna need that necklace back.

Lola: Awwww… _-hands to Aang who hands it to Sokka who runs off-

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**Elsewhere**

Zuko and Katara are stargazing

Katara: Oh, Zuko, isn't the night beautiful…

Zuko: Well, Katara… -_Starts singing "Music of the Night" by The guy in "THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA"-_

Night-time sharpens,  
heightens each sensation . . .  
Darkness stirs and  
wakes imagination . . .  
Silently the senses  
abandon their defenses . . .  
Slowly, gently  
night unfurls its splendor . . .  
Grasp it, sense it -  
tremulous and tender . . .  
Turn your face away  
from the garish light of day,  
turn your thoughts away  
from cold, unfeeling light -  
and listen to  
the music of the night . . .

Katara: Uh... O.o

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**ELSEWHERE!**

Sokka: Hey, Sakura-chan?

Sakura: Yeah, baby?

Sokka: _-Holds up the necklace-_

Sakura: Oh, Sokka! _-hugs him-_

Sokka: So… are you going to tell me what was in that notebook of yours?

Sakura: Sure… as a matter of fact… I'll show it to you -pulls out note book, and it has a song on it.- (I wrote it! Oh yeah! Who cares if it's horrible. Just make up your own tune because only I know it.)

Just give me a chance,

To shine my light.

I'm sure you'll find

I'll make your dreams tale flight

I'll show you very thing you never knew

I'll be you friend, your love, your fantasy

I'll be your sunshine, boy, when skies are grey

I'll be the one to chase your fears away

Because you set me free.

You didn't know me then

And neither did I

I was hidden away under purple skies

Every thing I knew was a lie

What is happiness?

I just now found out

It's that feeling you get when you know with out a doubt

He loves you and you love him, too

You'll show me every thing I never knew

You'll be my friend, my love, my fantasy

You'll be my sunshine, boy, when skies are grey

You'll be the one to chase my fears away

Because you set me free

Sokka: That's so beautiful…

Sakura: Like your heart? XD

Sokka:_ -shakes his head no-_ Like you… -_kisses the girl on the cheek-_ (Sappy stuff! YAY!)

**The End**

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Oh, it's the end... or is it the beginning? READ THE SEQUAL! WOOO! Complete Insanity: The Sequal!


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